"I've always depended on the kindness of strangers"

In my first post, I talked about waiting... about waiting for the right words to describe my sorrow and fears. For the emotions churning inside of me to organize themselves into articulatable (is that a word?) chunks. And over the past few days, I've added another mess to the chum in my brain: an overwhelming gratitute and wonder that defies all of my attempts at coherent thought.

Where are all these people coming from? I never had any idea that I had so many friends! It's just amazing to me-- I had no idea, none at all... (did I mention that I'm really not able to articulate yet?). Honestly, I don't think I have ever been so surprised by something in my life. I could babble and gush and thank and weep for hours over this.

First of all, we just finished up our week with Lorin and Brenda. Lorin and Brenda housed us, fed us, kept us occupied. And more than that, they sympathized, cursed at the television with us, assured us that we would never be without a home or an adjunct family, no matter what. And then they sent us on our way with belated birthday cards stuffed with money and love. I have adored these two women since the day that I met them (the same day I met Jason)... but their generosity has shattered me.

We have received offers of housing from every corner of the US. And it looks like we'll take up temporary residence at the home of a complete stranger to me-- a co-worker of my mother's has offered her vacation home in Oldsmar, FL to us. It's conveniently located and empty... and I just can't believe that some woman who doesn't know me cares enough for me to GIVE us her house for as long as we need it. (again, I babble, but this stuff is damned amazing to me)

A friend of Jason's sent an email to their mutual friends-- I don't know what it said, but suddenly people from Australia and England are sending us gas money! And just today I received two Target gift cards from teachers I worked with this summer. Unspeakably kind-- un-freaking-believably kind. I am so blessed.

And strangers-- a few days ago we were having a beer at a pub I used to frequent when I lived in Tampa, the bartender gave us free drinks. Two days ago, we were eating at a restaurant and the manager bought us nachos. Simple stuff. Little stuff. Amazing little acts of kindness.

I have heard from my old high school in CT. I have heard from students that I taught at CTY last summer. I have heard from an old high school classmate that I haven't talked to since graduation. I have heard from college friends that I haven't heard from in years. Everyone wants to help-- me, Jason, my school... whatever they can do.

Thank you, all of you. From the very basement to the attic of my heart, I am full up with love and gratitude for everything. From the kind words and thoughts to the generous offers and support... it means more than I could ever possibly articulate, even months, years from now I don't know if I'll have the right words for it.

You know, you get older, you get jaded, you think you know stuff. You think you can predict, assume, make reasonable guesses. Then things you thought were inconceivable start becoming reality-- and during this ordeal, at first all of those things were horrifying. But now I have seen inconceivable kindness, inconceivable generosity. Man, I knew nothing.